Chapter 23: A Major Shift in Thought

The great hall was in utter chaos. On one side lay Ling Qixi, writhing and convulsing on the floor; on the other, Chi Xiaoxiao and Cheng Yu, who appeared to have tumbled down in a scuffle. The four senior brothers, each named after one of the Calabash Brothers, did not dare meddle in matters between their grandmaster and Ling Qixi. Instead, they took charge of the new disciples, helping Chi Xiaoxiao and Cheng Yu to their feet. Meanwhile, the five children under Orange Senior Brother’s tutelage had been strictly forbidden to interfere in others’ affairs and could only stand obediently in place.

Even as Chi Xiaoxiao was being helped up, he clung tightly to Cheng Yu’s sleeve, reluctant to let go. Red Senior Brother, a straightforward and upright young man, mistook this for an attempt to continue fighting and strode over, grabbing Chi Xiaoxiao and tucking him neatly under his arm. He looked every inch the stern father disciplining a naughty child, lacking only a swat on Chi Xiaoxiao’s rear to complete the scene.

Having lived for many years and played countless roles with great success, Chi Xiaoxiao, for the first time, felt his acting skills insulted.

Cheng Yu, the supposed victim, took perverse delight in the spectacle. When a drama king meets a stickler for honesty, the first to take things seriously loses. He noticed the trace of disbelief flicker across Chi Xiaoxiao’s usually unreadable face and thought to himself that the little demon king must have been dealt a heavy blow by Red Calabash—truly, the Calabash Brothers are the bane of all demons and monsters.

Chi Xiaoxiao tried to wriggle free, first pretending to be in pain like a child squashed beneath an adult’s arm, but only received a “Why are you so weak?” from Red Senior Brother. When that didn’t work, Chi Xiaoxiao switched tactics and acted the part of Red Brother’s loyal sidekick, pleading for some dignity in front of so many people. Red Senior Brother, who’d returned from military service with a rigid sense of justice, replied emphatically, “If you know there are so many people watching, why are you fighting your fellow disciples? In the army, this would get you court-martialed.”

Chi Xiaoxiao was left speechless and aggrieved.

Meanwhile, Cheng Yu, who to everyone else appeared to be the pitiful child bullied and beaten to the ground, was showered with concern by Yellow Senior Brother. The third Calabash Brother even asked if he wanted to transfer to another mentor. “Your relationship is so fraught. If you both enter Eldest Senior Brother’s tutelage, clashes are bound to happen. And Eldest Senior Brother is a bit of a blockhead—if you’re bullied in secret, he probably wouldn’t even notice,” Yellow Senior Brother said earnestly. The so-called blockhead, upon hearing this, muttered sullenly but didn’t directly refute Yellow Senior Brother, only casting a wounded, resentful look his way.

Red Senior Brother, sulking on the side, really did resemble a husky sprawled on a couch, feigning injury. Cheng Yu, seeing his expressive face, conjured up a meme in his mind: “It wasn’t me, I didn’t do it, I’m so wronged—only a kiss from Third Brother can make it better.”

What on earth am I thinking? Cheng Yu marveled at his own peculiar imagination. Ever since arriving in this strange world—where the male lead didn’t love the heroine and even conspired with the childhood friend to torment her—he himself had grown increasingly unhinged. Now, he was even imagining some unspeakable bond between Red Calabash and Yellow Calabash…

Cheng Yu felt his identity as a romance novelist on the verge of collapse. He was nearly tempted to write a pure love story in the style of Chujiang Online, titled “The Roughneck and the Schemer: A Tale or Two,” a brotherhood blossoming into romance—it sounded rather compelling.

Yellow Senior Brother, the so-called “schemer,” was entirely unaware he’d become a character in the wild flights of Cheng Yu’s imagination. Red Senior Brother, meanwhile, set Chi Xiaoxiao down and strode over to stand beside Yellow Senior Brother, towering over Cheng Yu’s much smaller, adolescent frame.

“So, you think I’m crude?” Red Calabash frowned and addressed Cheng Yu.

Receiving this warning, Cheng Yu shook his head violently, hands raised in surrender, and backed away, protesting that he dared not. Yellow Senior Brother, seeing Red Senior Brother intimidating a child, promptly reached over to tweak his ear, eliciting a howl of protest.

Watching their interaction, Cheng Yu felt an odd sense of satisfaction, even wanting to chuckle with glee. In his mental notebook, he added the tag “henpecked husband” to Red Senior Brother—how exhilarating.

Sometimes, destroying a straight romance writer in a special environment was all too easy. Once a wild little author of slime-level innocence stumbled into the deep pit of boys’ love, climbing out was no simple matter. Cheng Yu, having just discovered a new world and a mysterious new obsession, was a prime example.

Meanwhile, Ming Shuang, who had just emerged from behind his uncle, had no idea his misguided iceball had not only injured his roommate’s secret true form but had also inspired him to switch genres and write boys’ love.

Chi Xiaoxiao, now freed, scampered over to Cheng Yu, grabbed his hand, and declared, “The seniors have misunderstood! Cheng Yu and I are closer than gold—we were just playing around, not fighting at all.”

Cheng Yu should have been used to Chi Xiaoxiao’s occasional flamboyant remarks, but having just opened the door to a new world, his thought process was no longer what it had been. Especially after hearing “closer than gold,” he couldn’t help but recall their first meeting, Chi Xiaoxiao’s bold approach, the flirtatious skit while digging potatoes, and the little demon king’s fiery display of affection during the competition. His hair stood on end.

No good deed comes without motive; if it isn’t theft, it’s mischief. Is this kid after my behind? Cheng Yu’s wild thoughts led him to a dangerous conclusion, and his gaze toward Chi Xiaoxiao became wary, like a proper young man staring down a ruffian.

On the other side of the hall, Master Changyan held one hand to his face, beckoning Kong Mingzi over with the other, signaling for his little disciple to come to him.

The little uncle saw his master’s gesture and headed toward the main entrance. Er Gou Ming Shuang, seeing his uncle move, hurried to follow.

The uncle and nephew approached the grand elder. Changyan, still clutching his face, coughed and said, “I heard Ling Xiaozi received a jar of Jade-Skin Salve from Lin He this morning?”

Ming Shuang was taken aback. He’d thought the grandmaster had summoned them for some important matter, not just to ask for the salve. Wait—how did the grandmaster know Lin He had set some aside for him? Ming Shuang’s suspicious gaze landed on Daoist Pingxu, who awkwardly looked away, pretending to admire the scenery.

Seeing no response from Ling Xiaozi, Changyan spoke pitifully, “Ling Xiaozi, my good disciple, your grandmaster has always treated you well. You young ones recover from injuries in a couple of days, but I’m just a bag of old bones—any little wound could fester, get infected, and before you know it, I’ll be at death’s door.” He even let fall two tears, hunched his back, and coughed, looking every inch a dying man.

Listening to the grandmaster’s plaintive speech, Ming Shuang was half-convinced that if he didn’t hand over the salve, he’d be the world’s worst and most unfilial disciple. But that guilt was quickly dispelled by the elder’s next line: “It’d be such a waste for someone as beautiful as your grandmaster to die.”

“Here you are, grandmaster…” Ming Shuang said helplessly, producing the coveted jar. Changyan’s eyes lit up, and with a sudden burst of energy, he snatched the salve away.

Once he’d applied the salve and his beauty crisis was solved, Changyan remembered his “Little Yun.” By now, Ling Qixi had stopped convulsing and lay motionless, eyes tightly shut, looking for all the world like a dead fish. Changyan glanced sideways at the girl trapped in the Violet Pearl Array and instructed Kong Mingzi to lift the spell and have the “corpse” taken out and buried—leaving her there was an eyesore.

“My disciple, I saw how excited you were when you first entered the hall and saw this girl—didn’t you say you wanted her as your disciple?” The little uncle retrieved the thunder pearls from the floor and spoke hesitantly.

To give it credit, the Jade-Skin Salve was truly worthy of its reputation. Ming Shuang watched as, in just seconds, the white ointment vanished, and the swelling on his grandmaster’s face was completely healed.

Having solved his beauty crisis, Changyan stroked his smooth face and said, “I was mistaken earlier, I thought she was the daughter of an old friend. Now I see the resemblance isn’t so strong. Anyway, she’s dead, so it hardly matters who she was.” His words were casual and indifferent, as though he were speaking of a wilted cabbage rather than a life lost.

The little uncle hesitated, wondering whether to reveal that Ling Qixi was merely unconscious. But seeing his master’s indifference—even eagerness to toss the girl into a pit—he swallowed his words and instead shot a look at Ming Shuang, hoping the one who’d given the grandmaster a salve might step forward.

Ming Shuang quickly noticed the look, and as soon as their eyes met, the little uncle glanced at Ling Qixi.

To his credit, Er Gou could be quite sharp when it mattered. Judging from his uncle’s attitude, he deduced two possibilities: either he was being asked to explain that Ling Qixi wasn’t dead, or to finish the job and make sure she never woke up.

Analyzing the situation, Ming Shuang figured his uncle, who’d failed to kill Ling Qixi several times already, was more likely hoping to spare her life.

In truth, Ming Shuang wanted to reassure his uncle: Ling Qixi was the heroine. Even if you buried her, she’d probably dig her way out, then walk a path of vengeance and darkness, slaughtering all of Qingyu Sect, and finally abduct Ling Xiaozi as her boy toy…

Ming Shuang shook these morbid thoughts away with a sigh—it was no use dwelling on them. The original novel’s influence had given him a deep-seated bias against the heroine, making it hard for him to change his mind. In fact, part of him secretly hoped his uncle would succeed in getting rid of Ling Qixi, though that was unlikely—plot armor isn’t so easily shattered.

Reluctantly, Ming Shuang pouted, walked over to Ling Qixi, and squatted down. With exaggerated care, he placed two fingers under her nose, then announced in dramatic surprise, “Oh my! She’s not dead! The heavens are merciful—we can’t just leave her here! Oh, woe is me!”

After this little speech, Ming Shuang discreetly turned his head to one side and mimed retching, clearly sickened by his own attempt at playing the hero.