Volume One, Chapter Twenty-Three: The Twin Fish Cave Dwelling

Before the cake had even set it down, the turtle could no longer restrain itself and leapt down eagerly. A sharp “thud” echoed, and it landed heavily upon the ground, unmoving.

Everyone was startled, and Meiniang, furious and anxious, cursed, “Hey! What kind of nonsense is this? If you don’t move, I’ll kick you down the mountain!” Though she spoke harshly, her heart was filled with worry: “Impossible, isn’t this a divine turtle? One fall and it’s finished?”

Moments passed, yet the turtle remained motionless. Fat Girl hurriedly crouched down and gently nudged it. “Hey, Brother Turtle, don’t frighten us! Are you alright?” Her voice trembled with urgency.

No sooner had she spoken than a muffled “boom” sounded. In an instant, the turtle swelled dozens of times its size. Had the group not dodged quickly, it might have knocked them off the mountain.

“Hey, you damned turtle! Are you trying to frighten us to death?” Hanyu cursed loudly. Despite their words, everyone was dumbfounded. The tiny turtle had become as large as a carriage.

“Heh heh... It’s been so long, I’ve forgotten the spell a bit...” The turtle looked so embarrassed its head seemed to turn green.

“Then speak up! We thought you’d fallen to your death, divine turtle!” Hanyu couldn’t help but laugh.

“Divine turtle? Hmm, that’s a fine name!” The turtle’s eyes spun mischievously.

“Brother Turtle, what’s this about?” Cake hurried forward, and the turtle finally turned its head. “Climb aboard!” it called.

At this, everyone paused in surprise. Meiniang was the first to leap onto the turtle’s back, stomping hard as she landed, but the turtle seemed not to feel a thing, prompting Meiniang to purse her lips.

Once all four had climbed onto the turtle’s back, it began to move forward at a slow pace, slower than if they’d walked themselves.

“Hey! Divine turtle, maybe we should just walk?” Hanyu, knowing the turtle liked flattery, spoke in a gentle tone.

“Haha, don’t rush! I’m just finding my balance—almost there!” Brother Turtle was so delighted, snot bubbles nearly formed.

True to its word, it picked up speed, soon moving as swiftly as a galloping horse, racing through forests and fields. Just as they thought it could do no more, the turtle suddenly soared into the air, its four limbs spreading like wings.

“Wow, a flying turtle!” Meiniang’s jaw dropped. The turtle immediately tilted sideways, nearly tossing everyone off.

“Divine turtle—” The turtle twisted its head in distress.

“Divine turtle! You’re the divine turtle! Fly properly, please! Good turtle...” Meiniang quickly soothed the flustered creature. Though it stopped turning its head, it was clearly still upset—its shell rose and fell in agitation. Still, the divine turtle’s flight was fast and steady. Having not flown in so long, it alternated between ascending, descending, gliding, and banking, constantly shifting its posture.

“Hey, don’t move around! Heh, it’s been so long since I’ve tried this...” the divine turtle said slyly. Before the group could react, it performed a sudden one-hundred-eighty-degree flip in the air! Instantly, Cake and the others found themselves plummeting headfirst toward the ground, but before they could cry out, the turtle righted itself and caught them securely.

“You damned turtle! You scared me to death!” Meiniang pounded the shell furiously. Even the usually calm Hanyu raised her jade pestle, and if not for Fat Girl’s intervention, she would surely have struck the turtle.

“Hahahaha...” The divine turtle laughed so hard its shell quivered.

“Brother Turtle...” Cake’s round face turned pale.

“Hey, Fatty!” Hanyu called out. As Fat Girl turned, Hanyu shook her head and pointed at Cake. Fat Girl quickly poked him. “She’s calling you!” Cake hurriedly turned around.

“Fatty! Take out that divine iron, turn it into a rope, and tie it around its neck!” Hanyu winked at Cake. He immediately understood and shouted, “Oh, I see!”

“No, no, no...” The divine turtle was so frightened it pulled its head into its shell. Balance lost, they began to plummet.

“Brother Turtle, stop! Stop! We won’t tie you up!” Cake yelled in terror.

“You must keep your word! Promise me!” The divine turtle finally stabilized, nervously twisting its head. It still feared the divine iron.

“Hah, now you’re scared, aren’t you?” Hanyu laughed.

“You wretched turtle! You wouldn’t even make a sound...” Seeing its state, Meiniang’s anger dissipated.

“I told you not to move!” the divine turtle retorted, aggrieved. As no one replied, it muttered self-consciously, “Heh, it’s been so long since I’ve flown—I couldn’t resist the itch!”

After that, everyone settled down. Under Meiniang’s guidance, it was less than a quarter hour before they saw, not far ahead, a surge of demonic energy. Mist revealed a dark mountain peak appearing in the distance.

“This is it! Blackstone Peak!” Meiniang pointed anxiously at a half-hidden cave halfway up the mountain. Above the entrance, four large characters were carved: “Twin Fish Cave Residence.”

The divine turtle dove straight for the cave, but when within a hundred feet, it veered right, landing slowly in a secluded spot on the mountain’s side. Upon touching down, it shrank back to palm size. Cake bent to pick it up, but it raised a foreleg and waved frantically. “No need, no need! I’ll wait outside!” With that, it darted into the nearby weeds.

“That one’s a sly creature!” Meiniang sneered. Seeing Cake’s confusion, Hanyu laughed, “It’s afraid that if we fail, it’ll be captured too, so it prefers to wait outside!”

“Oh!” Cake understood at last, thinking, “Brother Turtle truly is quick-witted!”

After a brief rest, the four decided Meiniang and Hanyu would disguise themselves to enter the cave, while Cake and Fat Girl waited outside to assist. Although Hanyu was very reluctant, she let Meiniang fuss over her for a long time. The once pure, lovely beauty was transformed into a seductive, alluring little demon.

“Hey, why are you frowning? This is the only way to sneak into the cave residence!” Meiniang comforted Hanyu with some guilt. Hanyu glared at her fiercely, saying nothing. Meiniang then disguised herself, letting her long hair fall to cover half her face to avoid recognition by familiar demons.

As they approached the cave, a patrolling demon called out, “Who goes there?” Meiniang didn’t reply, but smiled sweetly and approached, while Hanyu clutched her jade pestle behind her back.

“Oh! You shout so loudly, you’ve made my little heart thump!” Meiniang gently pushed the demon, who became dizzy and too nervous to speak.

“The groom’s joyous day is here, he invited me, and this is how you treat guests?” Meiniang pouted, feigning annoyance.

“But...” The demon started to speak, but Meiniang pressed a finger to his lips.

“Is the groom in the hall or the bedroom? I’ll go surprise him!” Meiniang said, walking into the cave. Hanyu, dumbfounded, hurried after her.

“... The hall...” The demon, already bewitched, gazed foolishly at Meiniang’s alluring figure, her fox tail teasing him playfully.

“Stop wagging your tail!” Hanyu, blushing, complained.

“No! You should show your rabbit tail and wag it too!” Meiniang replied, making Hanyu want to stomp on her tail.

Meiniang had only visited twice, but already knew the cave’s layout. They headed straight for the main hall. Peering through the doorway, they saw the hall festooned with lanterns, filled with bustling demons celebrating. The Jade-faced Lord sat on an ivory bed, exchanging toasts with the crowd.

“We’ll rescue the prisoners first, then the bride!” Meiniang glanced at Hanyu, who nodded and followed closely.

Soon, they neared the prison, where a male and female demon were flirting at the door.

Meiniang frowned. “Ah! Why did you push me?” Hanyu looked confused as Meiniang tumbled forward, landing right in the male demon’s arms, her thigh draped over his waist. “Oh dear...”

“Heh heh!” The male demon stared at Meiniang’s white leg, drooling.

“You...” The female demon stomped her foot in anger, but the male kept his eyes on Meiniang. “Careful, girl! Falling could be bad!”

“Thanks to you...” Meiniang pushed his chest. “The groom said there are many men locked up, and he wants us to choose some to ‘replenish yin with yang,’ but I can’t find any.” The male demon paused. “Choose them?” Meiniang frowned. “Should I choose you?” The male demon nodded eagerly. The female demon, furious, slapped him hard.

“Oh, you dare hit your husband!” Meiniang feigned concern, stroking the back of his head. Seeing his intoxicated expression, the female demon couldn’t stand it and stormed off.

“Ah, your little lover is angry. So, shall we choose or not? Hee hee...” Meiniang hugged his neck. The demon felt a cold chill and snapped awake, quickly pushing her away. “No, no! There’s plenty of good stuff inside—please, please go in!”

“You won’t regret it?” Meiniang lifted her skirt. The male demon shook his head like a rattle, thinking, “Glad I wasn’t enchanted, one ‘replenishing’ and I’d lose my life!”

Hanyu, already blushing, finally lost patience and struck the male demon, knocking him out. “Hussy, enough already!” Meiniang ignored her and bent to snatch the keys from his belt.

“Let’s see which one to choose first!” Meiniang jingled the keys, scrutinizing the men in the cell. They were all tightly bound and hung their heads nervously, except Jin Guishan, who stared directly at Meiniang. She sighed inwardly, “No wonder he’s the eldest brother!”

“You fox demon, what are you up to?” Jin Guishan had already recognized the Seven-tailed Fox.

“What am I up to? Naturally, I’m here to harvest your essence and restore my true form!” Meiniang joked as she approached the cell door.

“Stop joking! Hurry and let them out!” Hanyu snatched the keys and opened the cell.

“You...” Everyone inside was stunned. Wasn’t this the little traitor?

“Don’t listen to her! Your junior sister sent us to rescue you—quick!” Hanyu guarded the door, keeping watch.

Jin Guishan, though doubtful, saw Meiniang untying him and then helping his junior brothers, so he decided to trust her for now. He untied Qi Yuanxiao and whispered, “You get everyone out, I’ll go rescue Sister He!” With that, he tried to rush out.

“Wait! Are you stupid?” Meiniang pulled him back. “Do you want to alarm the Jade-faced Lord and ruin everyone’s escape?”

Jin Guishan was speechless.

“You all go first! The two fatties are waiting outside. We’ll go rescue your junior sister—if we stir them up, we can slip away in the chaos!” Hanyu explained. Seeing the logic, Jin Guishan ceased arguing.

Once everyone was untied, Meiniang led them carefully toward the cave entrance, dispatching any demons they encountered. Passing through the hall, Qi Yuanxiao found their weapons stored nearby, boosting everyone’s morale.

“Rescue your junior sister first—revenge later!” Hanyu reminded Jin Guishan, who nodded and urged calm. After guiding everyone to the entrance, Meiniang and Hanyu finally paused.

“Go straight out and you’ll see the two fatties. We’ll go rescue your junior sister now—try not to alert anyone!” With that, Meiniang turned to leave.

“Wait!... Miss, thank you!” Jin Guishan hurriedly bowed in gratitude.

“Miss? Hee hee, thank me properly outside!” Meiniang winked at Jin Guishan, leaving him awkwardly coughing.

To reach the Jade-faced Lord’s bedroom, they had to cross the hall. Fortunately, wine servers and food bearers were coming and going, so Meiniang and Hanyu intercepted them, offering to help. With two beauties like them, the demons were more than happy to oblige, even willing to switch places. Thus, carrying trays and chatting with the little demons, Meiniang and Hanyu walked into the hall with their heads lowered.

The Jade-faced Lord was already drunk, collapsed on the ivory bed, playing with a flock of demon maidens. After setting down the food and drink, Meiniang and Hanyu hurried through the hall.

The wedding spirit was everywhere—the passage to the bedroom was decorated with lanterns and festive symbols, silver lamps lining the way, and a long red carpet spread across the floor.

“This girl’s wedding is certainly worth it!” Meiniang chuckled. Hanyu ignored her, staying alert.