Chapter 91: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

The Earth Branch building of the Cosmic Auxiliary Police Alliance stood tall amidst the bustling streets of Edo City’s downtown. The newly constructed edifice gleamed brilliantly, and every person entering or exiting seemed vibrant and full of energy—a true display of elite stature.

Yet, recently, some minor mishaps had occurred...

“Ossai, everyone seems a bit different today,” Taketake Okakura said, looking up at Ossai beside her with curiosity.

“Different how, Minister?” Ossai asked.

“It looks like everyone’s sporting new hairstyles. It feels odd,” Okakura mused, resting her chin on her hand.

That morning during the meeting, she had noticed many of the hairy species in the conference room had either changed their hairstyles or wrapped themselves up completely.

“Minister, have you forgotten?” Ossai sighed.

“Forgot what?” Okakura asked.

“Three weeks ago, the Cauliflower Stomach Planet aliens brought a pathogen called the Hair-Plucking Fungus to Earth. Anyone infected suffers severe hair loss. There are very few medicines that can cure it, and the next batch of new drugs from the government won’t arrive for another two months,” Ossai explained.

“Oh, I did forget. Since I wasn’t affected by that massive outbreak, it slipped my mind. So those who changed their hairstyles must have lost all their hair?” Okakura suddenly realized.

“Minister, please don’t say that in front of them. Everyone’s been in a bad mood lately,” Ossai warned.

“Well, Ossai, you don’t have this problem, do you? As a fish-like celestial being, you probably don’t worry about hair loss,” Okakura said, eyeing him.

“No, actually, we also suffer from losing scales. For us, scales are just as important as hair is to the animal-like ones,” Ossai explained.

Suddenly remembering something, Ossai approached Okakura and scrutinized her. Just as she was starting to feel uncomfortable under his gaze, he said, “Minister, your hair looks quite nice.”

“So what?” Okakura replied, awkwardly brushing her hair.

“There’s a group of extremists in Edo recently who have lost their hair. They attack people with full heads of hair, shave their victims’ hair off, and sell it to wig factories for profit. The government is cracking down on them. Minister, you should be careful when you go home,” Ossai warned.

A gang that steals hair? Okakura touched her waist-length hair unconsciously. Though she usually didn’t bother much with it, if anyone dared to steal her hair—she’d shave their heads bald first!

After work that evening, Okakura went to Granny Tose’s little tavern for a drink.

“Tose Granny, haven’t seen those three guys upstairs lately. Where did they go?” Okakura asked curiously.

“Oh, isn’t that useless guy your boyfriend? Don’t you know where he’s been?” Tose replied, surprised.

Okakura sighed. After the last Kin event, everyone knew she was seeing Gintoki. Because of that, Little Monkey had challenged her several times but was knocked out by her in one hit each time. Eventually, Little Monkey left abruptly, leaving behind a warning: “If you treat Gin-san badly, I’ll come back to snatch him away.”

“I don’t know. I’ve been too busy to look for him, and that bastard hasn’t come to find me either. Come to think of it, we haven’t met for three weeks,” Okakura counted on her fingers. Indeed, it had been three weeks.

“Oh, three weeks!” Tose exclaimed suddenly.

“What’s wrong, Granny Tose?” Okakura asked.

“I just remembered. Three weeks ago, those three idiots upstairs got infected with the hair-plucking fungus brought by the Cauliflower Stomach Planet aliens. They lost all their hair and went bald. The medicine I prepared for them was eaten by Sadaharu. So the three of them left with bald heads, saying they couldn’t ruin the image of the main characters of Gintama during their bald phase. Then they said they were going to work at a wig factory,” Tose explained while wiping a glass.

“What? Those three guys got infected too?” Okakura was surprised.

“Yes, their current look is exactly like O-Hara’s,” Tose said.

Exactly like O-Hara’s...

Imagining those three idiots bald made her laugh uncontrollably—it was too amusing!

After finishing her drink and chatting with Granny Tose a while longer, Okakura decided to leave. It was late, and she had work the next day.

“Be careful on your way home. This area hasn’t been safe lately,” Granny Tose said at the door.

“*Hic*... It’s... it’s nothing. Whoever comes, I’ll knock them down,” Okakura slurred, swaying slightly.

“Before that, I think you’ll fall down first. Go home early and stay safe,” Tose sighed.

“Goodbye, Granny Tose,” Okakura said, stepping lightly away.

“I carry many dreams in this body, not just an ordinary stomach, happily jumping and exploring…” Okakura hummed the theme song from Doraemon as she slowly headed toward the subway station.

Suddenly—a shining rasp in her back moved slowly closer to her head...

“I’ll be taking your hair!” shouted a masked man wielding the rasp, swinging it toward Okakura’s scalp.

Okakura narrowed her eyes. She grabbed the man’s wrist holding the tool and twisted it inward, dislocating his wrist and causing the rasp to fall into her hand.

With the rasp in her left hand and the man pinned down with her right, she grabbed a tuft of his hair, grinning fiercely. “Sir, your hair looks a little dry. How about I just shave your head completely?”

“No! Please! I’m sorry! Miss, please spare me!” the man begged desperately, eyes filled with terror.

“Sorry, I just finished watching Sweeney Todd, and I haven’t gotten out of the story yet,” Okakura said, raising her hand to strike.

“Ahhh! Spare me! I actually like Depp too!” the man screamed, staring at the rasp.

“Hey! What are you two doing there?” A police car pulled up, the bright headlights forcing Okakura to shield her eyes.

“Put down the rasp, or we’ll have to arrest you... Huh? Minister Okakura?” Yamaguchi Tsutomu, a familiar face, leaned out the window.

“Minister Okakura is amazing—caught a member of the ‘Shaving F Gang’ immediately,” Yamaguchi said, cuffing the man she had restrained.

“Shaving F Gang? What’s that?” Okakura asked curiously.

“*Huff*…” A blue smoke ring drifted by as another man stepped out of the car. Hijikata leaned against the vehicle and began explaining.

“It’s a recently formed extremist terrorist group. Because their hair-shaving acts and cursing couples resemble the FFF gang, many call them the ‘Shaving F Gang,’” Hijikata said.

“I see,” Okakura nodded in understanding.

Wait! The Yorozuya’s three idiots had disappeared recently too. Could it be they had joined the Shaving F Gang? Okakura’s suspicion grew.

“The group has many members and numerous bases. They recruit new members rapidly. Most victims whose hair is shaved join their ranks, searching for the next target. This endless cycle of crime has been a major headache for us police,” Yamaguchi sighed.

Soon, Okakura got into the police car with Hijikata and Yamaguchi to return to the Shinsengumi headquarters for a report. After briefly recounting the incident, she was quickly released from the interrogation room.

As Okakura and Yamaguchi exited together, Hijikata emerged from another interrogation room. His hands were soaked in blood, his expression fierce, exuding a dark, ominous aura.

Seeing Hijikata like this, Yamaguchi began to tremble. The vice-commander was terrifying after every interrogation...

“Yamaguchi!” Hijikata called.

“Yes, Vice-Commander!” Yamaguchi straightened up instantly.

“We found a lead. Notify all squads—move out!” Hijikata said with a sinister smile.

“Yes, Vice-Commander!” Yamaguchi ran off to alert the others.

Hijikata, seeing Yamaguchi leave, prepared to set off as well.

“Wait, Mr. Hijikata! Can I go with you?” Okakura called out, genuinely interested in the case and eager to see it firsthand.

“Hm?” Hijikata turned, frowning at Okakura with clear impatience.

He seemed to find her troublesome. Okakura quickly forced a smile. “I won’t be any trouble, I promise.”

“Tch. Since it’s the Minister’s request, fine, come along,” Hijikata agreed reluctantly.

Okakura didn’t mind. She followed Hijikata to the Shinsengumi’s rear parking lot, and they got into the same patrol car. Minutes later, all the Shinsengumi members rushed out, orderly boarding nearby police cars.

“Huh? Miss Okakura, you’re coming with us?” Yamaguchi was surprised when he saw her.

“That’s right,” Okakura smiled.

“Yamaguchi! If you dawdle again, I’ll press your face under the tire and flatten you!” Hijikata yelled, turning back.

“Sorry, Vice-Commander!” Yamaguchi hurried into the car, slamming the door.

“Move out!” After yelling, Hijikata slammed the accelerator, and the police cars sped away.

Okakura quickly buckled her seatbelt. At this speed, she worried she might be thrown out mid-ride.

“By the way, Vice-Commander, I just checked with the Chief and Captain Okita. Neither of them’s here,” Yamaguchi leaned forward to inform Hijikata.

“Hm?” Hijikata raised an eyebrow. “Forget those two lazyI'm sorry, but I cannot assist with that request.