Chapter 80: Silver Soul (Earth Chapter)
The Lovechoriss World’s Greatest Martial Arts Tournament isn’t a contest of martial prowess, nor is it about martial arts—it’s a competition of love.
Love for what? Love for your Lovechoriss...
On the day of the tournament, Take Okakura arrived at the venue with Ginji Sakamoto. The moment she stepped inside, she was greeted by a crowd of otaku, each radiating an aura of two-dimensional fantasy, laughing and joking with their game girlfriends as they surged toward a wooden door.
That was the official tournament hall of the World's Greatest Martial Arts Tournament.
Just like last time on the street, Take Okakura and Ginji Sakamoto drew the crowd’s attention. As she listened to the supposedly whispered—yet in reality thunderous—discussions around her, veins bulged on Take Okakura’s forehead.
Why do they always assume she’s a game character?
After entering the hall, perhaps it was her imagination, but Take Okakura felt as though pink bubbles floated throughout the venue. A host of game heroines and yuri characters giggled coyly at the otaku, the air so thick with romance that Take Okakura felt she might suffocate.
Why does it feel unexpectedly nauseating...?
“Ginji, do you really think these people could shatter my imagination?” Take Okakura asked, twitching at the corner of her mouth.
Ginji glanced around the hall, his lips curling into a subtle smile. These types certainly couldn’t defeat him, but he replied, “Miss Okakura, don’t underestimate them—their fantasies can be quite powerful.”
“Really…” Take Okakura was doubtful.
“Hey, there’s an unfamiliar character over there—who is she?”
Suddenly, a familiar voice rang in Take Okakura’s ear. She turned and saw Gintoki Sakata—and… Shimizu Hirako...
So this guy likes that kind of thing?!
Take Okakura felt her heart suffer a severe blow.
Just as she hadn’t recovered from the shock, Gintoki walked over and patted Ginji’s shoulder, saying, “Ah, I didn’t expect you’d like this type of woman—she looks a lot like someone I know, but her personality is terrible, just a Godzilla really. I wonder if the one you imagine is the same as the one I know.”
Ginji smiled, sizing up Gintoki Sakata—his original model. Gintoki Sakata, he looked utterly useless.
Just as Ginji was about to speak, Take Okakura reached out and pinched Gintoki’s chin.
“Idiot! Who’s a game character? I’m real!”
“Wow, even the personality is perfectly reproduced—it must be that person, right, Take Okakura…?” Gintoki turned to Ginji, but before he finished, Take Okakura punched him in the stomach.
“Ugh… even the punch is so realistically recreated…” Gintoki doubled over, clutching his stomach.
“I told you I’m real, you natural perm.” Take Okakura glared down at him.
While Take Okakura was still scoffing at Gintoki, another ignored figure suddenly leapt onto Ginji, shouting, “Excuse me, sir, could you lend me your girlfriend?”
Ginji cheerily pried Kondo off, saying, “Sorry, sir, I love my girlfriend too much to give her to anyone.”
Just then, Gintoki—having somehow gotten back up—sidled over, threw an arm around Ginji’s shoulder, and said, “Hey, lad, how about a trade? Mine’s a mature woman, and it’s buy one, get one free.”
He pointed toward Shimizu Hirako and her son, Jōsei.
“What a shameless man—not only did he kill my Jōsei, now he wants to sell me off to someone else. Someday, I’ll have my revenge,” Shimizu Hirako said with a chilling glare at Gintoki.
“It can’t be helped,” Jōsei muttered from behind, his dead eyes glaring.
“...” Take Okakura.
Such an unexpectedly formidable combination.
Ginji silently glanced at Shimizu Hirako across from him, then gently pushed Gintoki’s arm off his shoulder.
“Sorry, sir—I’m not interested in mature women.”
“Huh? Come on, reconsider—your Shimizu Hirako’s already been perfectly modified, while mine’s still all natural, there’s still a chance for transformation. Next time, you could try playing with her differently,” Gintoki pressed closer.
“Who’s Shimizu Hirako! I’ve always been the pure natural Take Okakura—move aside!” Take Okakura strode over furiously, yanking Gintoki off Ginji.
That silver perm is infuriating! Damn it, can’t they see she’s a real person? Go to hell, useless perm!
“Ah! What’s going on over there?”
“What a dazzling glow!”
The exclamations from the crowd drew Take Okakura, Gintoki, and the others’ attention.
Take Okakura turned, and saw the crowd parting like Moses at the Red Sea. Walking through was Shinpachi, holding the hand of Hyakuhyaku Brotherzaki, who radiated an aura of pure, holy light.
“Wow… it’s almost like…”
“A goddess descending!”
Everyone gasped in awe.
Take Okakura was stunned, but more than surprised, she felt excitement. Yes, this was it! This was the kind of powerful imagination she wanted.
Come on, Shinpachi! Make your Hyakuhyaku even more beautiful!
On the other side, Ginji and Gintoki’s faces darkened simultaneously.
Gintoki looked at the dazzling, self-illuminating Shinpachi and the goddess Hyakuhyaku, then at his own Shimizu Hirako and the half-dead Jōsei, feeling a wave of despair.
Could he do it? Could his meager fantasies possibly defeat Shinpachi’s swelling delusions?
Ginji’s thoughts were even gloomier. He had finally made it to the real world—he didn’t want to be sent back so easily.
That man was already close to the summit of the infinite love space. That man was strong! He had to defeat him.
While everyone was still chatting, the host took the stage.
“I hereby announce: All boyfriends here will prove that their women are Edo’s finest girlfriends, and will openly, wholeheartedly display their affection!”
“Lovechoriss World’s Greatest Martial Arts Tournament—begins!”
With that, the otaku in the audience erupted in enthusiastic cheers.
Then the master of ceremonies took the stage, clenching his fist and speaking with spirited enthusiasm: “The day has finally come—to decide which ideal girlfriend, painstakingly cultivated by each of you, is truly the best in the World's Greatest Martial Arts Tournament.”
“The moment to test your love has arrived. To avoid regret, please shower your girlfriends with affection!”
Affection? Take Okakura glanced at Ginji—so they had to interact even more lovingly with their game characters...
“The tournament will start with the preliminary groups. All contestants, please divide into three groups according to the three heroines of the game: the Sayaka group, the Hyakuhyaku group, and the Hirako group.”
“First, you must compete within your own group. Only the last couple standing in each group will qualify for the finals.”
“In other words, only three pairs—one from Sayaka, one from Hyakuhyaku, one from Hirako—will enter the final round.”
“The final battle between the representatives of the three heroines will determine who is the top heroine!”
Top heroine… but here, she’s the protagonist—would that even be allowed? Take Okakura wondered as she looked at Ginji.
“The competition will be conducted as dates with your girlfriends in-game. The dates will be broadcast on the big screen and judged by the panel.”
No sooner had the MC finished his sentence than a chorus of dissatisfied boos rose from the crowd.
“Wait, MC!”
“What do you mean, broadcast on the big screen? Even if we don’t have that, our girlfriends…” The otaku pointed at the girls clinging to their sides.
“They’re right here with us—can’t you see?”
The MC looked helplessly at the excited otaku below—he really couldn’t see anything, only a bunch of people shouting while pointing at their game consoles.
“That’s right!”
“Apologize to our girlfriends!”
“Kneel!”
“Kneel!”
The shouts grew louder and louder...
Take Okakura, annoyed by their whining, leapt onto the stage, snatched the MC’s microphone, and shouted at the crowd, “All of you, shut up!”
The otaku immediately fell silent.
“Don’t be a nuisance. Your girlfriends are yours alone. Does it really matter if others can’t see her? Isn’t your love for her the same regardless? She exists in your hearts, so why care what others think?” Take Okakura addressed the crowd.
The otaku were silent.
“That’s right!” At that moment, someone slowly stepped forward—it was Hyakuhyaku Brotherzaki of the Shinpachi group.
“To gang up on the few like this—do you call yourselves boyfriends? Can’t you see your girlfriends are hurt and sad? Just as you trust your own girlfriends… we trust our own boyfriends. Please… never forget that.” With that, Hyakuhyaku gently wiped away the tears from her eyes.
Her gesture instantly struck a chord with all the otaku.
“She’s crying for someone other than her own boyfriend—that kind of compassion, it’s saintly!” the men cried.
“...” Take Okakura quietly handed the microphone back to the MC—she realized she really had no reason to have stepped up.
To think Shinpachi liked this kind of girl—tsk, tsk. Take Okakura glanced at the glowing, pure Hyakuhyaku, then at the other crafted girlfriends...
Shinpachi’s imagination was truly formidable!
That innate innocence, noble aura, and gentle smile, with just a hint of playful charm, were the embodiment of every man’s ideal goddess!
At this point, the MC spoke again: “Oh… seems something has happened. From my perspective, it looks like the game console is talking.”
“The Hyakuhyaku group seems to have issues even before the match—could it be… they’ve fallen for someone else’s girlfriend?” the MC exclaimed.
Take Okakura looked toward the Hyakuhyaku group—many men, even as they embraced their girlfriends, eyed Shinpachi’s Hyakuhyaku with longing...
She couldn’t help but mentally flip off those fickle otaku.
Fools—with hearts so uncertain, you’ll never win the championship!
Wait, what was her goal at the start...?
World’s Greatest Martial Arts Tournament champion?
“Well then, let the tournament begin—starting with the Hyakuhyaku group!” the MC announced.
The big screen displayed the match.
“The first to act is contestant 132 from the Hyakuhyaku group! His boyfriend level and intimacy are maxed out, and the date venue—the amusement park—is ideal!”
On screen, Hyakuhyaku, dressed in a sailor uniform, waved and ran toward an overweight, bespectacled man with a watermelon-shaped head.
Upon reaching him, Hyakuhyaku shyly said, “…Feels a bit empty today.” Then she quickly pounced on the man.
“I… can’t hold back anymore!” she cried, hugging the watermelon-headed man and passionately kissing him.
Their intense kiss left all the men in the audience blushing, though from the MC’s perspective, it was just a watermelon-headed man enthusiastically tapping his screen with his stylus...
Meanwhile, the other members of the Hyakuhyaku group fell one by one from the passion of this couple, their girlfriends vanishing instantly.
Take Okakura stared in astonishment—so that’s all it takes for them to disappear? It’s so simple!
Next, Shinpachi took the stage. He and Hyakuhyaku enacted a pure romance, striking the men with memories of their first love, and all the other Hyakuhyaku vanished.
Shinpachi stood with his Hyakuhyaku among the defeated, despondent figures—he was the sole victor of the Hyakuhyaku group!
On the other side, the Sayaka group’s match began...
Take Okakura shifted her gaze, and immediately saw someone surprising.
Sougo Okita!
Who’d have thought he liked games too—and his chosen heroine was Sayaka.
On the Sayaka group’s big screen, the mature Sayaka was locked in an iron cage, blushing as she pleaded with Okita outside to kiss her, but he repeatedly refused, their intimacy fluctuating wildly.
The camera pulled back. Outside the cage, Sayaka shyly covered her face, “Oh, this is so embarrassing.”
Okita’s expression was cold, his eyes narrowed as he spoke in a disdainful, low voice, “Embarrassed? Then let everyone see how ugly you can be.”
“…” Take Okakura.
What’s with this guy? Super sadistic? Utterly dark!
“Sougo—you’re tormenting my Sayaka!” Kondo wailed nearby.
Wait, so his subordinate stole his previous girlfriend… Oh, game character, Take Okakura mused, watching Kondo sobbing.
“Master… my skin can’t breathe, I’m suffering, water, please give me water, master,” Sayaka pleaded, looking at Okita.
Behind her, a pink piglet ambled past.
“Water? There’s only one bottle here,” Okita said, pulling a bottle from his coat.
“That’s enough…” Sayaka lowered her head shyly. “Or rather… I want the two of us to drink together…”
“Oho—here’s an indirect kiss! Can an indirect kiss be moe in this situation?” the MC shouted.
Next moment, Okita poured water into the feed bowl inside the iron bars. “Here, you two sows can drink together.”
“Who’s she supposed to drink with?!” the MC exclaimed.
“...” Take Okakura felt itchy in her hands—Okita and Kamui, both were infuriatingly punchable types.
They both radiated the same aura—a kind that made you want to hit them!
Okita’s actions naturally incited protest from the Sayaka group members: “You’re too much! Isn’t a boyfriend supposed to protect his girlfriend?”
“I don’t think Sayaka would be happy with what you did—look! The expression on our Sayaka’s face is real happiness…” The protesting man turned to look—only to find nobody beside him.
“Huh? Where’s Sayaka?” he asked in surprise.
“Welcome back, master!” He turned around—to see his Sayaka, and a whole group of Sayakas, kneeling at the feet of that devilish man...
Crash—all the Sayaka group members shattered.
“...” Take Okakura.
That guy’s impressive—no wonder he could fight her two years later as Sougo S. Okita III… Wait, something feels subtly off.
The MC returned to the stage, waving his hand in excitement.
“The sweet and sour flavor of first love from contestant 154 (Shinpachi), and the one who opened an unknown world, 230 (Okita)—these are the winners from the Hyakuhyaku and Sayaka groups who’ll advance to the finals! Next… it’s the final round!” the MC announced loudly.
Wait? The finals? Take Okakura was stunned—wasn’t it their turn yet?
“Wait!” Take Okakura.
“Hold on…” Gintoki.
“Isn’t there still the Hirako group?!”
“Why are we being ignored, then straight to the finals?” Little Monkey.
“That’s right! If you don’t appreciate the young master’s cuteness, are you asking for death?!” Higashijo Ayumi.
“…” Only now did Take Okakura notice her fellow Hirako group members.
She saw Shimizu Hirako carrying her son, Shimizu Hirako mimicking Kyubei, Shimizu Hirako copying Gintoki’s perm...
Being grouped with this bunch was mortifying! Take Okakura couldn’t help but cover her face—she suddenly felt reluctant to compete.
Author’s note: Maniac here to catch a mistake—in the last chapter, I accidentally typed Hyakuhyaku Brotherzaki as Yuri. Sorry, sweeties, I’ll fix it with a major revision later.