Chapter 107: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

"Alright, the contestants for the Takamagahara team have been selected. Now, let us choose the participants for abc.dotch." The emcee gestured toward the abc.dotch side, and the giant screen behind him began to scroll through names once again.

"One, two, three, stop!" The screen froze.

"The contestants for abc.dotch are represented by numbers. Let’s see... the ones selected are number 3, number 5, and number 9."

As the emcee finished speaking, three handsome men emerged from the abc.dotch side. One had bull horns, one was actually dragging a fish tail—a male mermaid—and the last one was a regular, good-looking man. They were numbers 3, 5, and 9.

"A bull and a fish... this is bad. They look incredibly formidable," Hijikata whispered to Gintoki.

"Yeah, they look like they could be turned straight into a main course," Gintoki replied nonchalantly.

"Now, we announce the dishes for the first round." The emcee pulled back the white cloth behind him, revealing two food towers stacked with vegetables, fruits, meat, and seafood. Each team had its own tower.

"The dishes for this first round are—curry rice and a soup."

Gintoki and Hijikata breathed a sigh of relief. Curry rice was a simple dish that anyone could make.

"Next, let us introduce the judges for this competition. The first is one of our bet-makers, Ms. Okakura Take!"

Applause broke out. Okakura Take sat at the judges' table and waved at the crowd. She felt that the view from the judges' seat was excellent; she could see the entire competition clearly.

"The second judge is Mr. Musashi from Kabukicho. Having survived on leftovers discarded by major restaurants and taverns, he possesses the most sensitive taste buds!"

Wearing an orange safety helmet, thick-rimmed glasses, and a diaper, Musashi waved and said, "If it’s edible, just eat it."

Thunderous applause followed.

"The third judge is the demon-goddess of Kabukicho, Madame Saigo! Also one of our special sponsors."

Dressed in a pink kimono with heavy makeup, the burly Madame Saigo shouted to the teams, "Yo! Good luck, you handsome boys from abc.dotch! Once you win, I’ll be sure to treat you well!"

At this shout, the handsome men of abc.dotch all turned pale, cold sweat breaking out on their faces.

"Hey! Emcee, this isn't fair! One of the judges is already biased toward the other side from the start. This is blatant match-fixing!" Gintoki pointed at Madame Saigo, fuming.

"Exactly! A judge like that cannot make an impartial decision!" Hijikata added.

"That doesn't matter," the emcee said dismissively. "There are still two other judges. If the remaining two vote for you, you’ll still win."

"Besides, you should hurry up. The competition has already begun. You only have 50 minutes, and your opponents have already started."

Gintoki and Hijikata turned to look across the floor. The three men from abc.dotch were already cooking. They worked with perfect synergy, moving silently and efficiently to chop vegetables, cook rice, and boil water.

"Oh no! We need to start, too!" Gintoki said.

"Curry, curry... let's make beef curry. Go find the ingredients!" Hijikata ordered.

The two turned toward their food tower...

"Hiccup..." Kagura was lying next to the food tower, patting her round belly and resting.

"Ah—! What have you done!" Hijikata screamed as he ran over. He took one look and realized there were barely any ingredients left.

"With so little left, how are we supposed to cook?! You useless curly-haired bum, why didn't you keep an eye on your gluttonous girl!" Hijikata said, pulling at his hair in a frenzy.

"Hiccup. Gin-chan, it was so great to join this competition. I even got a free meal out of it, aru," Kagura said, patting her stomach contentedly.

"I'm sorry, Kagura! It's all Gin-san's fault for letting you say such pathetic things, but you've eaten all our competition ingredients!" Gintoki fell to his knees, utterly defeated.

"Hmm? Ingredients? It's fine. I just finished eating, so it shouldn't be digested yet. Ugh... I can still... ugh..." Kagura stuck her fingers down her throat and began to gag.

"Wait! Kagura, what are you doing!" Gintoki asked in terror.

"Wait! Don't tell me you're planning to..." Hijikata was also shocked.

"..." Okakura Take, who was sitting at the judges' table drinking water, silently set down her bottle. She already had a terrible premonition.

"You said we didn't have enough ingredients, so I'm... ugh... giving them back to you... ugh," Kagura said while gagging.

"Don't! That stuff is useless even if you bring it back! Kagura, stop it!" Gintoki shouted.

"If you really spit out those ingredients, our team will lose immediately! Stop it!" Hijikata yelled.

Gintoki and Hijikata rushed toward Kagura to stop her, but it was too late...

"Ugh... blech..." Kagura had already vomited. She let out a sound and sprayed a pile of pixelated, foul-smelling regurgitated matter...

"..." Okakura Take—help! She felt a wave of nausea herself.

"..." Gintoki.

"..." Hijikata.

Hijikata and Gintoki, who were closest to the mess, froze completely. They had no idea how to handle such a disastrous situation.

"Let me see what's still usable." Kagura began rummaging through her vomit. After sifting through it, she pulled out an undigested tomato and said, "Gin-chan, this tomato is still good. Putting tomato in curry is quite tasty, aru."

"Ugh..." Okakura Take.
"Ugh..." Gintoki.
"Ugh..." Hijikata.
"Ugh..." The abc.dotch team.
"Ugh..." Madame Saigo.

The audience, both on and off the stage, began to dry-heave. They were all completely disgusted.

"Ah, the Takamagahara team has not only affected their opponents but also sickened the judges and the audience. Even I find this scene rather uncomfortable. Let's interview Mr. Musashi, the only judge who didn't vomit," the emcee said, thrusting the microphone toward Musashi.

"Mr. Musashi, what are your thoughts on this scene?" the emcee asked.

"If it’s edible, just eat it," Musashi said nonchalantly.

"So, Mr. Musashi, you believe that the vomited tomato is also edible, correct?"

"If it’s edible, just eat it," Musashi replied again.

"It seems Mr. Musashi believes that even if the Takamagahara team uses that tomato, it is still edible," the emcee concluded.

"Are you kidding me! How could anyone eat that!" Hearing this, Okakura Take felt terrible. How could anyone eat such a thing? They were the judges who had to taste the food later!

"Exactly! If you keep talking nonsense, Host, see if I don't vomit right into your mouth!" Madame Saigo was also very displeased.

"Ugh..." Okakura Take felt like vomiting again at the thought.

"It seems there is a significant disagreement among the judges. Let's look back at how the competition is going now." The emcee walked back to the stage with the microphone.

Over there, Gintoki was struggling to stop Kagura from scavenging for ingredients in her own vomit, while Hijikata stood by the food tower, contemplating how to make curry with the scraps. Meanwhile, their opponents, abc.dotch, had already started cooking.

"It seems the Takamagahara team encountered difficulties right from the start. Can they really still win?" The emcee created suspense to keep the audience hooked.

Finally, Kagura gave up on scavenging. She and Gintoki joined Hijikata at the food tower to brainstorm. The rice was already cooked; they just needed to make the curry and the soup.

But their only available ingredients were curry cubes, fish meat (the beef had been eaten raw by Kagura), green peppers, onions, and some seasonings.

"How are we supposed to make curry with just this?" Hijikata said helplessly. He wasn't much of a cook to begin with, and being forced to use these few items was a nightmare.

"..." Gintoki stared at the ingredients for a while, then his eyes lit up.

"From now on, listen to my command. I've figured out how to do this. Don't worry, we'll definitely finish it," Gintoki said confidently.

"Mayo-kun, you go handle the fish." The fish, which was still splashing water everywhere, was tossed to Hijikata.

"Kagura, you chop the peppers and onions." Those were the only two things he could trust her with.

At the judges' table, Okakura Take watched the Takamagahara team. Seeing Gintoki’s excitement, she thought: He must have a plan. Gintoki is quite good at making cakes; I wonder how he is with actual cooking?

Thinking this, Okakura Take began to look forward to it. Eating food made by that deadbeat wouldn't be so bad.

The Takamagahara team finally started working. Hijikata drew his sword, placed the fish on the cutting board, studied it carefully, and then struck.

Swish, swish, swish! With a few elegant flourishes of his blade, the fish that had been flopping around was transformed into neat fillets.

His impressive knife skills captivated the audience.

"Wow, the black-haired guy from Takamagahara is so cool!"
"Yeah, the way he used his sword just now was amazing!"
"Go, guy!"
"Do it again!"

Hijikata had earned some popularity among the female audience.

"That mayonnaise addict is just killing a fish, what's there to be surprised about?" Gintoki, who was boiling water, said jealously.

"Exactly! I'm chopping vegetables too, why aren't they cheering for me, aru? Hmph!" Kagura pouted, staring at Hijikata with jealousy written all over her face.

"..." Okakura Take.
You’re on the same team! Why are you having internal conflict at a time like this?

"Whatever that mayo guy can do, I can do too! Watch my dual-blade chop, aru!" Kagura pulled out a second kitchen knife and started hacking away furiously.

"Kagura, you're chopping too hard! You're pulverizing the vegetables!" Gintoki called out.

"Ah!! My eyes!" Kagura suddenly screamed. A tiny piece of onion had flown into her eye. "My eyes! My eyes!"

"The Takamagahara team has encountered another situation. At this rate, will they really be able to finish their meal?" The emcee started fanning the flames.

"Kagura, don't panic! I'm coming to save you!" Gintoki said frantically, but as he moved to help, his foot slipped (on Kagura's vomit), and he plunged headfirst into his pot of boiling water.

"Ow, ow, ow!!" Gintoki jumped up, his skin bright red, and kicked out, sending the entire pot of boiling water flying toward Hijikata.

"What!" Hijikata didn't react in time and was splashed directly in the face. He groaned in pain and stumbled backward, remembering there were ice cubes on the food tower he could use to soothe his face.

"My eyes hurt so much, aru!" Kagura ran around randomly, waving her dual blades.

"Ahhh, my hair is going to get burned off!" Gintoki wailed, clutching his scalp on the floor.

"Ice! Where is the ice!" Hijikata groped his way forward, clutching his face.

The Takamagahara team was in total chaos.

"..." Okakura Take.
"..." Kyoshiro.
"..." Shinpachi.
"..." Okita.
"..." Kondo.
"..." The Emcee.
"..." The audience.

What on earth did these three come here to do?!