Chapter 101: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

"Gin, come over here with me." Okakura Take ceased her vomiting, stood up, and walked toward the corner, beckoning Gintoki to follow.

"Look, he's trying to make amends with me because he got someone pregnant," Gin-ko said, turning with a sigh before following Okakura Take to the corner.

"Ahhhhhhh—!!" A minute later, a shriek from Gin-ko echoed from the corner. Everyone else pretended not to hear and walked away, whistling.

After pinning Gin-ko firmly against the corner wall and giving her chest a thorough kneading, Okakura Take’s temper finally cooled.

The battered Gin-ko squinted with dead-fish eyes, looking vacantly at Okakura Take. "Ah, this is bad. Gin-san feels like my first time is going to be completely ruined by you."

"Sorry, but by the time I lost my own first time, I don't even know where it went. At least I gave you my complete first time," Okakura said, straightening Gin-ko’s collar.

When the two returned to the control room with flushed faces and disheveled hair, Sarutobi was the first to leap over. She pointed at Okakura Take’s nose and roared, "What is going on! You scumbag, I just heard you got someone pregnant! What kind of joke is this? How could you do this to Gin-san, even if he has turned into a sow?"

"The last part was completely unnecessary, you jerk!" Gin-ko yelled back.

"Who got pregnant! If you keep spouting nonsense, I'll crush you all!" Hijikata-ko also jumped out, nearly at his breaking point.

Okakura Take clutched his forehead powerlessly. "Sarutobi, don't listen to them. There's nothing between me and Hijikata-ko. I only saved her."

"I see, so it's a 'body-for-a-body' deal? Gin-san, hurry up and abandon this woman—oh no, this man! Come, put on this S&M queen outfit and trample me to vent your anger!" As she spoke, Sarutobi pulled a revealing leather outfit out of thin air.

"In the end, you're still just a perverted masochist!" Gin-ko roared.

"Give it a try. It would look perfect on you right now. I'll add 30,000 yen!" Sarutobi crouched down, tugging at Gin-ko’s robe.

"This isn't a hostess club! Hey, although you're doing the same things, you seem even more perverted now that you're a man!" Gin-ko said with a tearful face.

Okakura Take didn't even want to watch the scene unfolding; this group of idiots was giving him a massive headache.

"Thirty thousand? Is that 30,000 in reinforcements? Excellent, then I'll do it!" Kagura-ton also donned a revealing leather outfit pulled from who knows where, joining in the chaos.

"Excellent your head!" Gin-ko retorted instantly.

"Kagura-chan..." Okakura Take wanted to cover his eyes even more. An old man in a queen S&M outfit was far too painful to look at.

"Stop it, Sarutobi." At this moment, Tsukuyo stepped up and draped her arms around the shoulders of Gin-ko and Kagura-ton.

"Whether it’s the heart or the appearance, if it’s a man on the outside, the heart remains a woman."

"Flowers do not care for beauty or ugliness. As long as they bloom before your eyes, you should give them equal love. Only by being able to do that can one call it the mettle of a man." Tsukuyo-o finished, puffing on his pipe with a light smile, an overwhelming aura of masculine hormones exploding on the scene.

"Tsukuyo, you’re too cool!" Okakura Take couldn't help but clutch his heart and exclaim.

"Hey! Saying that with your current appearance makes you look like a pervert, too!" Gin-ko gritted her teeth and hammered Okakura Take on the head.

"Hehe, I feel like everyone’s current gender suits them better now. Perhaps if things go on like this, things will actually go more smoothly," Otae said, walking over with a smile.

"Don't say such terrifying things!" Gin-ko complained.

"Then..." Otae walked over to stand with Tsukuyo-o, Okakura Take-ma, and Yagyu Kyu+1-bei. She rested a hand on Tsukuyo-o’s shoulder and said, "Everyone, do you think that once you return to your original state, you can outperform these high-level men? You’ve made no contributions, yet you want to snatch their fruits of labor. Are you going to be shameless, or turn back into useless cowards?"

"..." Gin-ko.

"..." Hijikata-ko.

"..." Okita Sogo-ko.

"..." Kondo Gorilla-ko.

"..." Pink-glasses Shinpachi.

"Rather than that, it would be better to just be women, let Tsukuyo take care of everyone, and work hard in Yoshiwara. That would be a greater contribution to society," Otae said with a smile.

"Leave it to me," Tsukuyo-o nodded.

"What do you take us for, one by one!" Hijikata-ko snapped.

"That's right, is your only goal our bodies!" Kondo Gorilla-ko added.

Watching Gin-ko’s mouth twitch, Okakura Take reached out and stroked her hair. "Don't worry, Gin-san. I’m not that kind of useless man who would make you sell your body to support me."

"..." Gin-ko.

This guy is definitely saying that on purpose! He must think Gin-san is super useless as a man!

"I don't care if it's someone else's battle results or whatever. We must take back our original bodies! Hey! Haven't you found it yet? Haven't you found the antidote to restore our bodies?" Hijikata-ko turned around and shouted at the members of the Chest Selection Squad behind him.

"This... Vice-Chief, we can't find anything like that!" one of the squad members said.

"Not only that, the Archpriest of the Otuu Cult... is gone as well." Yagyu Kyu+1-bei’s words made everyone’s face sink.

"Could it be... that this isn't their headquarters at all?" Okakura Take asked.

"No—" The surveillance screen, which had been destroyed by the new men behind them, flickered to life. On the screen was the missing Archpriest of the Otuu Cult.

"That was indeed our base on Earth, but destroying the base doesn't mean everything is solved."

"What's going on?" Okakura Take couldn't help but ask.

"It’s a pity, but what you are looking for is no longer on this planet."

"However, I have seen all your actions through you, Kyu-bei."

The Archpriest’s words shocked Kyu-bei. She looked in surprise at the sword hanging at her waist; the Archpriest had placed a monitor on her sword!

"Didn't I say it? God is always watching you."

"Like us, existing as neither man nor woman... a pure existence that can become a messenger of God."

"Kyu-bei, you have excellently followed the teachings of God and passed this trial. To praise this heart of martyrdom, we, no—"

"God will surely keep his promise."

The Archpriest said this while taking out a small remote and pressing a red button.

Boom! Everyone heard a massive roar from above Kabuki District.

"The Earth has returned to its original state, and Kyu-bei can live as you wish. This is God’s gift to you." The Archpriest smiled, then turned her head slightly to look at Okakura Take. "By the way, you are Okakura Take, right? There is a man who really wants to see you. He asked me to tell you: 'With great power comes great responsibility.' This... is also a test for you."

*With great power comes great responsibility*... that... masked man!

"What is going on! Explain it to me clearly!" Okakura Take lunged at the screen.

"Goodbye, everyone." After saying this, the Archpriest’s face vanished from the screen.

"Um, everyone, let's not just stand here. Should we go up to the surface and see?" Pink-glasses Shinpachi suggested, trying to ease the heavy atmosphere.

Everyone nodded and climbed up one by one. This time, even Hijikata-ko climbed up successfully.

The sky over Kabuki District was the same as ever. The people lying on the streets slowly began to climb to their feet. Their first reaction was to look at their own bodies, and then everyone began to cheer.

"Wow—!"

"Hey, hey, look!"

"Our bodies are back to normal!"

"It's true, we're back to normal, ahhhhh!"

"That's great!"

People on the street shouted at the top of their lungs, their faces full of joy.

On the other side of the street, a small group of people watching this scene froze.

"The streets are back to normal... except for those of us who were stuck underground..." Gin-ko said, her mouth twitching.

They had saved the world, but the world had abandoned them!

In this world, only they remained gender-swapped, neither men nor women...

"Don't mess with me, ahhhhh! What is going on!"

"Why are we the only ones who are still like this after passing the trials!"

"This must be fake! That last blast shouldn't count! Fire the virus again! I beg you, fire it again!"

Gin-ko and Hijikata-ko shouted furiously at the sky.

At that moment, the Kabuki District broadcast sounded again.

"Notification to all citizens in the district: The attack satellite targeting Earth has been successfully destroyed. The special martial law is now lifted—"

Everyone’s faces stiffened. Their last hope was gone...

Okakura Take looked down at his body and then at the sky, feeling a bitter taste in his heart. Would he have to live as a man forever?

"Darling!!!" With a crisp voice, a little girl with black hair wearing a blue kimono rushed into Okakura Take’s arms like a cannonball.

"Darling! You really are a man! Look, everyone else has changed back, but you haven't. Darling, I'm a girl now, can you be with me?" The little girl said, sticking her tongue out at Gin-ko, who was standing to the side with a dark expression.

"As for you, you old woman, get lost!"

"..." Gin-ko.

Old woman! That hateful little brat, where is she old!

"Nagasaki Yumi?" Okakura Take looked down at the little girl hugging him.

"That's right, it's me! Darling, am I cute?" Nagasaki spun around to show him.

"Cute, you're certainly cute..." Okakura Take said, his mouth twitching. He was telling the truth; Nagasaki Yumi had black pigtails, straight bangs, and a delicate, fair face. She looked adorable... so adorable that he couldn't imagine her gender-swapped form was a 1.9-meter-tall brute.

However, he still didn't like girls! Although he could appreciate a pretty, cute girl, he didn't like women!

"Right, Darling? I told you I was prettier than that old woman," Nagasaki Yumi said, grabbing Okakura Take’s arm and shaking it coquettishly.

"..." Gin-ko, being called an old woman repeatedly, was truly past her limit!

"Yo, little sister, do you really understand the adult world?" Gintoki looked up, picking his nose as he stared at Nagasaki Yumi.

"What do you mean?" Nagasaki Yumi asked, furrowing her brows.

"Hijikata-ko, come over here," Gintoki turned and beckoned Hijikata.

"What is it? And if you call me Hijikata-ko again, I’ll chop you," Hijikata said, walking over impatiently, clearly in a bad mood.

Gintoki grabbed Hijikata and pointed at his stomach, saying to Nagasaki Yumi, "See? This is where the adult world begins. The man beside you is very unfaithful, and he has strange tastes. He already got the pork cutlet next to me pregnant. Little sister, you're still young, don't throw your life away on a scumbag like this."

"Who got pregnant!" Hijikata-ko shouted.

"Who is an unfaithful scumbag!" Okakura Take protested.

Nagasaki Yumi’s face darkened as she gripped Okakura Take’s arm. She looked at Okakura Take, then at Gin-ko, and finally roared, "Liar! You're lying! You must be saying that because you want to trick me into leaving Darling's side!"

"Right, Darling?" Nagasaki Yumi looked at Okakura Take with expectant eyes.

"..." Okakura Take.

What to do! If he admitted to getting Hijikata-ko pregnant, he could successfully shake off Nagasaki Yumi. Wait, that makes him sound like such a scumbag... but if he denied being a scumbag who gets women pregnant, he’d feel annoyed. What should he do!

"Little sister, why don't you believe me? Here, let me show you the evidence. This Hijikata-ko is even having morning sickness." Gin-ko tilted her head and delivered another triumphant blow.

"What are you saying, you jerk! Where am I having morning sickness..." Hijikata-ko immediately refuted.

"Oh, is that so? Hijikata-ko, the sewer water is very dirty, and it contains some human waste—"

"Blegh..." Hijikata-ko gagged.

"Blegh..." Okakura Take gagged.

Before Gintoki could finish, both Hijikata-ko and Okakura Take threw up. The thought of the sewers was enough to make them both feel nauseous.

Gintoki, having successfully struck a blow to the little girl, crossed his arms and said, "See? This is the dirty adult world. The man you've set your eyes on is just such a shameless man."

"Blegh..." Okakura Take gagged.

The most shameless person here is you, you jerk!

"No, why is it like this..." Tears began to pool in Nagasaki Yumi’s eyes.

"Yu... Yumi..." Okakura Take looked up at her cautiously.

Damn it! He hadn't done anything wrong! How did he end up looking like a scumbag who toys with a young girl's feelings!

"Darling, you're an idiot!" Nagasaki Yumi shouted at Okakura Take and turned to run away. The moment she turned, Okakura Take saw a few crystalline tears fly into the air.

Setting aside the scientific impossibility of tears flying like that, the point was that he was completely labeled as a scumbag who toyed with a woman's heart!

He hadn't done anything, hey! As for those guys behind him, stop looking at him like he’s some kind of scumbag!

Besides Gin-ko, he hadn't even pushed anyone down! No, to be precise, he hadn't even really pushed Gin-ko down either!

Will someone please have some faith in his character!

*Author's Note: The heroine was angered to death, this story is officially concluded! (Smacks, you’re using this trope for the third time, aren't you bored yet!)*