Chapter 100: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

Whether man or woman, some people are born with the heart of a true champion. No matter what hardship they encounter, they can always find a way out. And now, after adapting to their new identities, a group of women transformed into men was ready to strike back.

“Okakura, get over here. It’s time to move.” Tsukuyo turned toward Chiku Okakura from the other side.

“Right. I’m coming.” Chiku walked over to Tsukuyo.

“Wait! Wouldn’t it be better to investigate thoroughly before taking action?” Yamazaki asked nervously, her hair tied into twin ponytails.

“No need.” Chiku waved a hand. “We’ve done everything that needed doing. Now it’s time for our counterattack.”

“Exactly. We don’t have time to bother with useless men. Only real men need follow us.” Tsukuyo folded her arms.

Her words made the old men standing nearby twitch uncontrollably at the corners of their mouths. They could feel the entire universe rejecting them.

“Then let’s go, Tsukuyo.” Chiku carried her spiked club over to a manhole cover and raised it high before smashing it down with all her strength.

Bang!

The manhole cover was shattered open.

“Move out!”

The women who had been transformed into men climbed down one after another with astonishing speed.

“Um… Kagura, the Red Hare is too big. It’ll be difficult to get her down there.” Chiku watched Kagura struggling to drag the Red Hare toward the opening.

“I’m not Kagura! I’m Kagura Atsushi! Even if the enemy has set an enormous trap down there, I’m going in! Even if I lose an eye, I can still keep fighting!” Kagura declared while straining to haul the Red Hare downward.

“…”

Chiku Okakura. This disobedient old man was seriously getting on her nerves.

In the end, Kagura Atsushi managed to drag the Red Hare down. Chiku helped by shoving the animal several times from behind, nearly passing out when a burst of gas erupted from its backside and wafted straight into her face.

The group of women trudged through the muddy water, following the foul stench of sewage until they found the control room at the center of the Concave-Convex Sect. The place had already descended into chaos.

“All the surveillance cameras have been destroyed!”

“Every one of them was taken out with a single strike from a blind spot… Not one camera caught sight of the culprit. At the same time, we’ve lost contact with everyone patrolling outside!”

“They destroyed the cameras and captured everyone outside at the same time… Impossible!”

“We can’t just sit by and do nothing!”

“No! The High Priest said we are not to leave this place!”

“This is an emergency! We don’t have time for that sort of talk!”

Listening to the panicked voices inside, Chiku smiled. “Those rats hiding in the sewers have been scared witless.”

“Indeed. What a bunch of cowards.” Sarutobi pushed up her glasses and sneered.

“Now let’s round up every last one of those rats! Hyakka, move out!”

Tsukuyo waved her hand, and the entire Hyakka unit rushed forward. The Concave-Convex members guarding the control room were sent flying in every direction.

“What!”

The Concave-Convex members panicked when they saw the group of women charging inside.

“Hello, everyone. The men of Earth have come to discuss a few matters of gender relations with you.” Chiku waved cheerfully at the stunned members of the Concave-Convex Sect.

“Don’t worry. We’re believers in the Concave-Convex Sect too.” Yagyu raised a hand.

“Men should have a manly presence, and women should have a womanly presence. In reverence to the sole doctrine of the Concave-Convex Sect, we have arrived!” Sarutobi announced.

“These are the true men of Earth!” all the gender-swapped men declared proudly as they faced the members of the sect’s central stronghold.

The Concave-Convex members were instantly enraged.

“You bastards!”

With that roar, they charged at Chiku and the others.

Unfortunately, the Concave-Convex members were pitifully weak in combat. Against this group of monstrous women with their strength boosted beyond all reason, they never stood a chance. In the blink of an eye, they were beaten into complete disarray.

A handful of women had utterly crushed a large force of Concave-Convex members. Their dashing figures moved through the filthy sewers below, leaving the old men watching from above so stunned that their jaws hung open.

“Um… What exactly is going on with those men?” Ginko said, the corner of her mouth twitching. “They were already incredibly strong, but this is on another level! They’re absolutely more handsome and manly than we ever were as men!”

The men below were so devastatingly cool that the men who had originally been men felt like throwing themselves against a wall.

“Damn it! We can’t lose to a bunch of women! Stop wasting time. Boob Selection Squad, move out!” Faced with this situation, Hijikata X-ko chose to rise to the challenge—while completely forgetting her current physical condition.

The instant Hijikata X-ko jumped down into the sewer, her body blocked the opening completely, shutting down every possibility of the old men making a grand entrance and showing off.

Once all the Concave-Convex members had been dealt with, Chiku clapped her hands and stepped aside. Cleaning up the battlefield was no longer her problem.

Still, why were Ginko and the others taking so long to come down? Forget dealing with the surveillance system—weren’t they going to come down and help?

Puzzled, Chiku walked over to the opening. There she saw a fat meatball in a black kimono wedged firmly inside it, completely sealing off the passage. Two plump feet waved helplessly above her, and a pair of black underwear printed with mayonnaise was even visible.

“…”

Chiku Okakura. What on earth are you doing, Hijikata X-ko?

At the same time, she heard a group of women shouting from above.

“Come on! Pull this pig out with all your strength!” That was Ginko.

“We can’t! He’s stuck too tightly! We can’t move him!” Kondo shouted.

“Boss, don’t make this so complicated. If we cut the pig in half, it’ll be easy to get down. Come on, Boss, get to work.” Soko’s bright voice was followed by the cold sound of a sword being drawn.

The two fat feet blocking the opening began kicking even more violently.

“You bastards! Are you trying to kill me? Sougo, stop making trouble at a time like this! Wait—Yorozuya, you’re actually going to do it?”

Hijikata X-ko’s panicked voice echoed down from above.

Chiku was utterly helpless. At this rate, who knew when those idiots would finally make it down?

She resigned herself to the situation and climbed up the sewer ladder until she reached the opening. Then she poked Hijikata in the thigh.

“Mr. Hijikata, stop moving. I’ll pull you down. And everyone up there, be quiet.”

“That voice… Division Chief Okakura! Please pull me down!”

Hijikata X-ko immediately chose the more dependable side.

“Then I’m pulling.”

Chiku took a deep breath and wrapped one arm around Hijikata’s lower leg. She had originally intended to grab him around the waist, but his waist was far too thick for her arms to reach around.

“One, two, three!”

On three, Chiku suddenly heaved with all her strength and yanked Hijikata out of the opening.

Pop!

The instant he came free, the sound was exactly like the cork being pulled from a bottle of red wine.

But it wasn’t over yet.

“Wait!”

Because she had pulled too hard, Hijikata lost his grip on the ladder. His foot slipped, and he fell straight down.

Chiku was directly beneath him.

Watching the enormous body come crashing toward her, Chiku could do nothing but maintain an expression of terror. She did not even have time to dodge before Hijikata slammed into her and knocked her downward.

Crash!

The underground water exploded upward as the two of them hit it, spraying everyone gathered around the opening.

“Um… Is Miss Okakura all right?” Shinpachi asked Ginko, the corner of his mouth twitching.

“Probably… maybe… she should be all right?” Ginko said uncertainly.

Shinpachi and Ginko exchanged a glance.

“Chiku! Hang in there! I’m coming down to save you!” Ginko declared, then quickly climbed into the sewer opening.

“Fourteen! Fourteen, are you all right? I’m coming down!” Kondo Shoko followed, her long hair swinging as she climbed down after Ginko.

“Oh dear. She was crushed underneath X-ko and ended up as a human cushion. That man has probably had his intestines squeezed right out through his—” Soko began in her usual sadistic tone, but she climbed down as well.

“Miss Okita, don’t say such horrifying things!” Shinpachi complained as he climbed down after them.

Help… Somebody help…

When Hijikata X-ko carried her crashing into the sewer, Chiku truly felt as though all her internal organs had been knocked loose. It was especially unbearable when the filthy, stinking water surged up into her nose as they struck the surface. The sensation was enough to drive anyone insane.

And on top of her was an enormous lump of flesh. It had driven her all the way to the bottom, and the two of them had sunk into a heap of garbage.

Chiku decided that this was the worst memory of her life. It was even worse than running naked and eating raw meat on a planet full of monsters.

But the most important thing right now was—

Someone, please come save them!

“Chiku!”

Just as Chiku was about to suffocate, the lump of flesh pressing down on her was lifted away. Someone pulled her out of the water.

A small, soft body hugged her tightly and dragged her onto solid ground. Chiku narrowed her eyes and looked up at Ginko’s panicked face. Her first thought was that Ginko’s chest was surprisingly soft.

At a time like this, she was still thinking about something like that. Could she ever turn back into a woman?

“Chiku, are you all right? It’s a miracle you didn’t get flattened into a roast-meat pizza crust after being crushed under that fat pig!” Ginko said as she vigorously pressed down on Chiku’s stomach.

Pfft!

After coughing up several mouthfuls of filthy water, Chiku finally felt somewhat better.

“Ah… I’m alive again. But I still feel disgusting…”

Chiku crawled over to the water’s edge and began vomiting. She felt as though she was on the verge of death. Her mouth tasted foul, her stomach felt awful, and once everything was settled, she was definitely going to the hospital for a checkup.

“Pfft! I’m dying…”

Nearby, Hijikata was also revived by Soko’s rough treatment. His first reaction was the same as Chiku’s: he crawled to the water’s edge and began vomiting.

The two of them had swallowed quite a lot of filthy water. When Soko mentioned that it might contain all kinds of indecent excrement that would have to be censored, both their faces turned green, and they vomited even more violently. They almost wished they could throw up their internal organs and wash them clean.

“It’s over. Ginko, what happened to Okakura and the others?”

Tsukuyo walked over just then. When she saw the two of them vomiting at the water’s edge, she looked puzzled.

“It’s nothing. X-ko got Division Chief Okakura pregnant, so naturally X-ko is suffering from morning sickness. As for Division Chief Okakura, she was disgusted by the fact that such an ugly woman had become pregnant with her child, so she threw up too,” Soko explained maliciously, twisting the truth as she looked at the two of them.

“You bastard! Don’t make up ridiculous possibilities that never happened! X-ko has only been a woman for how long? And how could I possibly sleep with her and get her pregnant?” Chiku turned around and hurled a noodle cup she had fished from the water at Soko, who dodged it effortlessly.

“Sougo! You rotten brat! I’m going to kill you as soon as I recover!” Hijikata glared furiously at Sougo.

Suddenly, Tsukuyo came over and crouched down beside Chiku. She looked at Hijikata X-ko, then at Chiku, her eyes filled with regret.

Wait! Tsukuyo, what is that look supposed to mean?

Chiku suddenly developed a terrible feeling.

“She may not be very attractive, but now that she’s carrying your child, you have to treat her properly. I don’t want my friend to be such an irresponsible man.” Tsukuyo lowered her eyes and spoke to Chiku in a consoling tone. When she finished, she gently patted Chiku on the shoulder.

“…”

Chiku Okakura.

She actually believed that?

Tsukuyo, you really are a sweet girl!

No—wait! Just how terrible was Chiku’s reputation in Tsukuyo’s eyes that she could so readily believe Chiku would get some random woman pregnant?

“You faithless bastard! You’ve been cheating on me behind my back, and with a woman like that of all people! You said you didn’t want children for the time being, yet you got a woman like her pregnant anyway! You simply don’t want to have my child, do you?”

Ginko covered her face with her sleeve and crouched down beside Chiku, sobbing loudly.

Of course, Ginko was only pretending to cry for the fun of it. The situation had awakened her wicked sense of humor, and seeing the miserable expressions on Chiku’s face and Hijikata X-ko’s face made it even more amusing.

Chiku, who had somehow been saddled with the labels of faithless lover and womanizer, and Hijikata, who had been branded an ugly woman who had slept around with a man and gotten pregnant, both wore expressions as dark as the filthy sewer around them.

“…”

Chiku Okakura.

“…”

Hijikata X-ko.

These bastards should all just go die together!