Chapter 43: All Men Loathe Themselves, All Men Fear Loss

…
A series of bubbles drifted upward, translucent like jellyfish.
Water surged in from all directions, soaking her from head to toe. She couldn’t keep her eyes open; contact with the water’s surface was uncomfortable. Water filled her ears with a clanging noise. So much water—it choked her, causing unbearable distress.
Her body sank downward while the air rose above. The bubbles drifted farther away. She tried to reach out for the air, but her left hand was clutching her throat, and her right hand was immobile, powerless.
Downward, downward. Unable to breathe, overwhelmed by indescribable agony, paralyzed—this pain was different from the small shop’s; this time it was physical torment. Her thoughts grew harder to sustain. She was…
Suddenly, a flash of clarity: she understood her predicament.
She was dying.
Once she grasped this, her mind inexplicably stirred again—perhaps a mercy granted by the gods, a gift only bestowed before death. Memories streamed before her eyes: parting from family, being brought to the Celestial Capital, living alone, scaring off and eliminating those who dared to bother her, a dull solitary life, meeting Gongsun Ce and Mo Yuan Kai, meeting the senior doctor—still dull.
Still lonely.
She tried to find people in need to help, offering kindness. She helped some, but they left, uneasy. Others didn’t need help. A few got along well but left after a few days. The cycle repeated—failure after failure—until she found a dirty boy.
She met Shiyu Renyi.
Someone willing to stay by her side.
She was no longer so lonely.
Gongsun Ce became easier to get along with. She met Qin Qianbai. They formed a small group. More friends came. The days passed in the blink of an eye, memories jumped to today, to now.
Now she was dying.
She wanted to smile—to die with a touch of grace—but no smile came. Her expression must have been terrible.
How pathetic. Said she would protect Qiluo, yet fell in such a place.
…
Her hat floated up, drifting like the bubbles, away from the dark depths toward the light.
She wished the rapidly changing scenes would stop, to glance once more at happy memories. The flowing memories stilled, and she saw herself in high school.
It was an astronomy club activity.
Though called a club activity, it was merely a few students from different grades sitting in a small classroom after school, chatting idly. A senior had tried to flirt with her several times but gave up after being rejected. The club was dull, but for her, first time joining such activity, it was somewhat fresh.
She wanted to liven up the club, so she seriously made several activity plans: buying new equipment, stargazing from tall buildings in Longshou District, contacting university professors for guidance… Each proposal was met with bitter smiles. The senior complained that the club was fine as it was; there was little funding, and nobody wanted to make too much trouble.
She thought it was just excuses, a lack of enthusiasm. She made a fifth proposal, this time considering others’ free time and the club’s remaining budget—a perfect plan suitable for all.
The president didn’t even look at the plan and pushed it aside. He seemed angry, sighed heavily, and provocatively suggested the next activity be karaoke or even a nightclub outing. Others chimed in. The atmosphere was noisy and suffocating, as if she had committed a crime.
She was furious, utterly disappointed. So she set fire to the entire classroom.
The astronomy club incident closed a chapter. High school memories continued, revealing the delinquent who flirted, the classmates gossiping behind her back, the girls spreading rumors, and many more vexing people and events… all dealt with by her fire.
After that, few dared to approach her.
She saw herself angrily questioning Renyi why everyone around her was so boring; Renyi responded with a bitter smile, saying nothing.
Renyi knew the answer wouldn’t please her. He also knew.
She, too, always knew why she had so few friends.
Her personality was terrible.
She always resorted to her superpowers to solve everything.
People called her the Red Lion. She hated that name, despised anyone using such nicknames.
Because she knew the name was accurate.
She was irritable, neurotic, self-righteous, and self-centered. She had selfish expectations of others, and when they failed to be as “interesting” as she imagined, she would throw a hysterical tantrum like a beast wielding violence recklessly. In the end, she ruined everything, scared everyone away, and sat alone amidst the ruins, quietly grieving.
Fortunately, there was Renyi.
Renyi always tolerated her willfulness, accompanied her everywhere without complaint. After spending so much time with him, she truly believed she had changed—not so willful, more mature, easier to get along with… until today, when her true nature surfaced.
After a firestorm, even Renyi was driven away by her. Just because he made a joke, because things didn’t unfold as she expected…
That became their last meeting.
She didn’t even have time to apologize.
She had indeed changed—not for the better, but weakened.
…
Memories ceased to surface; her morbid thoughts slowed and finally stopped. She saw no bubbles, no hat, not even felt her body.
She vaguely glimpsed a black shadow. The phantom of death had come late.
Sorry, Renyi.
The shadow embraced her like a real person.
Lifted her upward toward the light.
…
“Fire…”
Voices buzzed chaotically by her ears, indistinct.
Her body was struck repeatedly; she involuntarily expelled water, gradually hearing sounds as if someone was shouting.
“Kar… fire…!”
She couldn’t do it. She was groggy. Because… what was the reason… couldn’t do it…
Her lips felt something strange; air was pushed into her mouth, warm and reassuring, carrying a familiar presence.
I am being…
“Cardecia, become fire!!”
Her will to self-extinguish was suppressed by fierce emotion; she flared into a blaze, then awkwardly reverted.
The water evaporated; she breathed deeply, memories awakening in her mind: Death Wing’s power, Skull’s schemes, glimpses during drowning, the black shadow holding her… the warmth on her lips…
“Cough, ugh?!”
Cardecia suddenly opened her eyes, instinctively trying to cover her mouth, but her right arm was still immobile, and her left arm was firmly held by someone.
That person stood beside her, clad in a black suit, his handsome face pale, eyes burning with fire.
“Renyi—?!”
Shiyu Renyi held the girl tightly; droplets dripped from his hair, striking her equally soaked clothes.
“The Demon Museum”
“Cardecia.”
Their bodies pressed together. Renyi’s voice was steady, but she sensed his entire body trembling. Though he was the rescuer, he appeared more terrified than she was, who nearly died.
He held her so tightly, like a child clutching a precious treasure, as if letting go would make her vanish forever.
Cardecia drew a soft breath.
“It’s okay, Renyi.”
She whispered comfort to him, though she was the one saved.
“It’s okay, Renyi, I’m not dead.”
Renyi breathed heavily, slowly releasing her.
Without a word, he lifted her up, causing a gasp.
“Qiluo messaged me. My powers couldn’t reach you. I contacted Gongsun and received a warning. We’ve been tricked. Do you have any connected electronic devices on you?”
She didn’t fully grasp what he meant and instinctively replied,
“I probably only brought my phone, gave it to Qiluo…”
“That should temporarily block interference.” He nodded. “Also, Skull’s powers haven’t changed; the reversed single-wing mark is a spiritual illusion technique. This time, he enlisted help from the Uncertain Law user.”
He carried the girl out of the reservoir. Around the exit lay ten black-clad figures, their faces twisted as if gripped by unspeakable terror. A familiar red sports car was parked by the roadside. Renyi opened the door and placed her in the passenger seat.
“The car came automatically to pick me up—probably thanks to Qiluo. Don’t worry, I removed the car’s network module on the way here.” He explained to the stunned girl. “Someone sabotaged the traffic system; I almost arrived too late.”
He clenched his fist.
Cardecia gasped like a fish out of water, opening and closing her mouth. She admitted her mind couldn’t keep up; she didn’t understand how Renyi managed all this or what he meant by so many things. She only understood two things: one, Renyi saved her life; two, she suddenly stopped breathing, and her left hand was moving again restlessly.
“It’s okay, it’s okay, Renyi! Compared to this, I’m infected now. You better stay away; I might hurt you!”
The youth from Zero Island removed his gloves, revealing a scarred hand.
“Cardecia, hold my hand.”
He whispered. The girl, confused and shocked, took the rough hand.
“The price is a minute of stinging pain; the reward is that the curse will transfer to me for three minutes.”
Instantly, her body felt lighter; the will to self-destruct truly vanished. She watched the youth close the car door and sit at the wheel, his expression as if meeting her for the first time.
“So…” Cardecia asked anxiously, “is this your real power? But Renyi, Skull’s power is—”
“I know.”
Compared to healing, transferring the curse temporarily costs far less. Skull’s power was essentially a curse.
Coincidentally, his specialty was also curses.
The youth tightened his grip on the steering wheel, smiling gently at his beloved girl.
“I’ll explain everything later. For now, leave it to me.”
She gazed at the familiar smile, inexplicably relieved.
“Who the hell are you!” “Get out of the car!” “Move aside, bastard!” Outside, chaos erupted. The black-clad men called out angrily, raising weapons. Gunfire spat toward the car, but the professional bulletproofing turned the bullets into mere toys. The youth pressed the accelerator; blue flames burst from the rear, the Crimson Comet’s engine roaring at full throttle, crashing the black-clad men meters away! Death Wing’s obstruction was futile; the car charged out of the reservoir amid screams and sparks!
“Wow!”
Cardecia excitedly exclaimed, then suddenly said, “Did you just kiss me?”
The suit-clad youth handed her a soaking wet fedora, his arm stiffening at her words.
“I was performing CPR… I mean…” The girl’s lively expression made him more embarrassed. “Can we talk about this later, Cardecia? Let’s finish what we have to first.”
She snapped on the fedora, rolling her eyes.
“So, are we going on a date now, or is this another prank?”
The suited youth looked as if choked.
“We’ll first—”
He picked up his white glove but didn’t put it on. Cardecia grabbed his hand, pressing the scarred back against her smooth cheek.
Shiyu Renyi froze.
She gently rubbed his hand, stubborn and unyielding.
“Date or prank?”
Renyi looked at the determined girl; her golden hair shone like sunlight. For a moment, he couldn’t close his eyes. His lips twisted bitterly, then finally broke into a smile—a smile tinged with helplessness, composure, and unprecedented ease.
“What were you planning to do originally, Cardecia?”
“Oh, I was planning to smash Skull’s head.”
“Alright, then we’re going on a date.”
The crimson sports car sped away, two figures rushing toward the path of death. Renyi’s reply was carried far by the wind:
“While smashing Skull’s head, of course.”