Chapter Sixty-Eight: There Were Times When I Truly Wanted to Die in Your Arms

Mai Xijun leaned against Shen Yanlie’s shoulder, her eyelids drooping. At this moment, her whole body was limp and aching, drained of strength; tiny beads of sweat dotted her forehead.

“Do you want to go again?” Shen Yanlie’s tone, as if teasing, drifted languidly into her ear while he lightly nibbled her earlobe, his cheek brushing hers.

“No…” Mai Xijun shifted slightly in his embrace, every ounce of her strength dependent on him. If he were to suddenly let go, she would surely collapse to the floor, completely unprepared.

Shen Yanlie laughed, scooping her up and walking slowly toward the desk.

When her hips touched the cold surface, Mai Xijun seemed to react instinctively, her eyes flying open. Shen Yanlie was watching her with a scrutinizing gaze.

“What are you doing?” she asked warily, but his gradually resuming movements answered her more clearly than words ever could. From beginning to end, he had never truly let her go. She tugged experimentally at her already disheveled blouse, her bra long since vanished to some unknown place at his hands.

“What can I do? You’re just too enticing. I can’t get enough,” Shen Yanlie said, the corners of his mouth curling into a wicked, seductive smile. He gripped her ankles, wrapping her legs around his waist, making it impossible for her to escape.

In broad daylight, in the office… Mai Xijun could not even imagine how she would face coming into his office again in the future.

Now, whenever she closed her eyes, shame threatened to consume her.

“I’m tired. You… you should hurry and leave,” she stammered, pushing weakly at him, but Shen Yanlie only hugged her tighter, pressing his body to hers. His slightly calloused fingers trailed over the snowy softness of her chest.

Mai Xijun arched away instinctively, trying to put space between them—yet the more she tried, the more she seemed to yield to him. Startled, she realized she’d fallen right into his trap. This was his version of ‘playing hard to get’…

Suddenly, a look of clarity dawned on Shen Yanlie’s face. A faint smile played at his lips, as dazzling as cherry blossoms in March, bewitching Mai Xijun’s gaze in an instant. In this moment, he was utterly unguarded, like a child—so different from the ruthless, steel-hearted man he was in the business world. The contrast was stark.

He was too relaxed now, as if he had laid down all his burdens, as though in this entire world, only the two of them existed and nothing else.

“Mai, you’re playing hard to get,” Shen Yanlie’s smile broadened, his warm breath brushing her cheek, an invisible enticement.

Mai Xijun bit her lip softly, her heart racing, cheeks flushed, an unconscious air of allure blooming within her.

“It doesn’t matter. I like you no matter what. There have been times when I truly thought I might die in your arms,” Shen Yanlie went on, his voice growing more unrestrained, the wicked curve at his lips intensifying. His thumb gently kneaded her cheek, as if he could never get enough of her, his gaze growing more earnest with every passing second.

“Mai, now that you’re my woman, you don’t need to please me, nor go out of your way to make me happy. Just stay by my side and love me with all your heart. Leave everything else to me.”

Shen Yanlie was so sincere in that moment, his intensity making Mai Xijun’s heart quake with a fearful thrill.

His tenderness and trust felt like a vow at a wedding, as if he were a gentleman entrusting her with his life, cherishing her as the precious treasure in his palm, vowing to protect her with all his being.

He burned so fiercely for her, threatening to melt her entirely—but if his passion was this intense now, how much would it scorch her in the future? He was so domineering; the man said to have a heart of steel had, for her, become soft as silk.

Mai Xijun swallowed, her throat so parched she couldn’t utter a sound, a stinging ache rising in her nose and her vision starting to blur.

Never in her life had she heard such moving words. Even Xue Lizan, who had been by her side for six years, had never said anything beyond a quick “I’m waiting for you” after her classes.

Though they were engaged, with their families’ blessing, their intimacy had gone no further than holding hands or brushing lips together. In fact, before meeting Shen Yanlie, she hadn’t even known that a French kiss meant exploring each other’s mouths.

“From now on, there’s no escape. Alive, you belong to me—dead, you’re the spirit of the Shen family,” he declared.

He kissed her again, pressing her beneath him, sweeping aside every obstacle, pinning her to the desk and entwining with her in a fevered embrace—intimate, relentless, consuming.

Perhaps it was the ache of years left unfulfilled, or perhaps she had come into his life at the perfect moment. In any case, there is no such thing in this world as love without reason. There are simply reasons you cannot see, or that I have not confessed; perhaps, when we met, you happened to smile—or perhaps you frowned. That is why I loved. That is why I came.

Carrying this surge of feeling, he acted with even greater fervor, taking her to the heights of ecstasy. With a low groan, passion still burning, he gathered her limp body into his arms and carried her to the private lounge adjoining the office.

Exhausted, Mai Xijun soon drifted to sleep on Shen Yanlie’s arm. He lay on his side beside her, half-propped up, gazing down at her.

She had appeared at just the right moment… so much so that he was powerless to resist. Of course, that was why Yu Wen Si had sought out Mai Xijun.

Because Yu Wen Si knew full well that while Shen Yanlie was not a man swayed by emotion—his reason far outweighed sentiment—when it came to those closest to him, he could not maintain the same cold rationality he displayed in the business world.

Once, Xie Yunting had meant everything to Shen Yanlie. But Xie Yunting had left at the worst possible time—a wound that struck Shen Yanlie to his core, something he could never truly forgive.

If, at my moment of need, you are not there, then you need never return. That was Shen Yanlie. He didn’t need many people, which made those he did need all the more precious.

Back then, when he needed her to stay, she left without looking back, her reasons so noble that Shen Yanlie couldn’t hold her back even if he tried.

Five years had passed; everything should have been settled long ago. Especially when another woman stepped into his life, what happened five years ago should have ended then and there. Yet his old feelings, and Xie Yunting’s passion upon her return, left him unable to refuse her outright.

But now, things were different. Because there was another woman—one who would stay by his side. She had given up an incredible opportunity for him, sacrificing her bright future, letting it slip away or even destroying it, all for him. So he was willing—willing to do everything, anything, for her.